Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
