I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
