Farmville is her only friend.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize