Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
