i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Cover your peen. We're going out.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
