you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
