kristin has been a bad kristin
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
i drank out of a bidet.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
