If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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