Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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