In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
