She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
You made out with two different species that night
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize