I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
