real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize