I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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