His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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