Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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