omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
