found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
