Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
