That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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