it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
literally had 100 drinks last night.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
