Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize