I wannas sexs uuuuu
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
