I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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