You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
