8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize