She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
