D3 body, D1 cock
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
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