he shaved USA in his pubs
why do cheetos always look like penises
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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