i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
