hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Blood and glitter go together right?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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