Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize