I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
