Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
