Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
