you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
