i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
