FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
