STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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