Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Randomize
