Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
