The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize