he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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