Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
she looked like the before picture.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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