if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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