That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize