you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
