we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
