girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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