i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
