I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Do vagina's smell?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize