break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
even my farts smell like vagina
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Randomize
