Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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